From the recording Wishful Thinking
This song was written in the Winter of 2024, weeks removed from an adult ADHD diagnosis. I had went cold turkey on many habits I had fallen into: alcohol, poor dietary choices, and an SSRI I had taken for many years to little success.
I waited for weeks until the hope that the New Year would bring a better version of me, and a second chance at life. One that I could be proud of. That life is still a work in progress.
Lyrics
I'm waiting by the phone
For Spring to call and the snow to go
So I can move along
With seeing if I do belong
To something in my heart
Not all of me, just a little part
So I will ramble on, and wait
I've spent the Winter clean
As clean as I can ever be
Due to circumstance
My mind is loose out of my hands
Faulty chemistry
Has broken bad every part of me
So I will ramble on this little song
So I might grow into the man
That I have always wished to be
Something more than I
Can formulate with words
And I know that it's wishful thinking
Believing I am more than me
But this rambling mind
Won't ever sleep
Regret is like a curse
That I have cast with no remorse
And to find the cure
I'm scrambling for another door
That might let me in
To try on what lies within
But deep down I know
I've a rambling mind
That won't grow into the man
That I have always wished to be
Something more than I
Can formulate with words
And I know that it's wishful thinking
Believing I am more than me
But this rambling mind
Won't ever sleep
Won't ever sleep